Monday, March 1, 2010

Heaven is Lucky

I often get stuck on one thing that is happening in my life and let it worry me to no end. I obsess about it and let it consume a lot of my time and energy...and mostly I just worry with no real action or final resolution. Many times, my worry is over something trivial, but to me, it seems like the most important thing in the world. B often reminds me how lucky we are, and tells me that I need to give my life over to the Lord and trust that he will take care of me. I can't say I am good at that, or that I have really ever tried. Especially as I continue to struggle with my relationship with the Lord.

In the past week and a half, two amazing people that have touched my life have passed away. Actually, they passed away within a day of each other, but I only just found out about one today.

The first was an extremely intelligent, caring individual, who always had a smile on his face and strived to make the world a better place. I was lucky enough to work with him for a few years, and although we were not "close," knowing that he is no longer a part of this world is difficult for me. Such a wonderful, young soul, who cared about people.

The second was B and my vet. We had heard that he had been in a logging accident earlier in the month and often wondered how he was doing, but had not heard anything. Tonight, as I was browsing through our local newspaper online, I saw an obituary for him and my heart just sunk. We only started to go to this vet when we moved to our house a little less then 2 years ago, but he was a vet like none other. He truly cared not just for the animals he was working with, but the people who loved them. Although not young, like my former co-worker, his death is a blow, and our community has lost an extremely valuable asset.

It is times like these that I realize that B is right. We are very lucky, and what I am worrying about is nothing compared to what others in the world, or even that I know, are struggling with at this very moment. Many times, the things that I am worrying about are things that can be fixed or taken care of if I choose to take action. But the families of the two men that were recently lost? They can't change that.

One thing that these two men had in common (despite being loved and valued by many) was a love of the Lord. As B said about my co-worker, "He was a man who loved the Lord, and it was so obvious." And it truly was. And one thing I can say about the families and many of the close friends of these two men is that they too love the Lord, and despite their struggles, I know (through conversations with and comments by some of them) that they are continuing to have faith and believe, despite the very real difficult times ahead. It seems that every time I am at one of those points where the worrying consumes me, things happen that remind me that my worries are trivial. Sometimes I wonder how many times the Lord has to reach out and show me that I need to trust him before I will finally acknowledge that he will take care of me.

**sorry if this is a bit scattered. I have so much going through my head, I had a hard time organizing this post.


ann ominous said...

sorry about your vet that stinks :-(

your thoughts about C echoed dawned on me when I was talking to JHJ that of all the people in the world who could pass away that unfortunately, C was probably completely at peace with it. I can almost imagine him getting up to Heaven and saying "hey, no worries God! I'm happy here" with that big smile of his.
Have you heard anything else? I know they're collecting funds...but is there a service?

Kathie @ Just a Happy Housewife said...

I'm so sorry to hear this. I can relate because I am the same way about stuff. I really fixate too much on what is bothering me....I have trouble letting go as well.

Aleta said...

I'm so sorry about your losses. It can make the world feel more empty... at the same time, I relate to your feelings and what your husband says, because like you - I can focus too much on negative problems going on and Greg will say, "It's going to work out."

We just need to have more faith :)

5thsister said...

I am so very sorry that you have had to deal with so much sorrow in such a short time span. You are right, though, we must trust in the Lord no matter how hard that might be. He knows we struggle. Sometimes I just say "Lord, you're going to have to help me carry this burden because I can't do it by myself!" Take care and God bless.

PS...Stopping over from SITS. You have a lovely place here.

Suzann said...

I'm visiting you from SITS this morning and your post has made me lift you up in prayer. Sometimes the roads in our life are difficult and filled with sadness. Your post was beautiful and well spoken and made me feel. Hugs to you and wishes for a wonderful weekend.

Agy Talks said...

"I often get stuck on one thing that is happening in my life and let it worry me to no end. I obsess about it and let it consume a lot of my time and energy...and mostly I just worry with no real action or final resolution." - IT IS SO ME!
Thanks God I am not the only one in this world who often gets stuck on one thing..

Stopping by from SITS.


Agy Talks said...

Have an award for you, go & get it girl:

Just Smile :)


hellosweetworld said...

I also make a big deal about some minor things sometimes. Lately it's been a little better but i just keep in mind that things could be alot worse. I'm so sorry to hear about these losses. Hope you are doing well otherwise. I'm glad i could finally stop by and say hi!

Divine Mrs D said...

Visiting from SITS

I understand your struggles. And I honestly believe that it's a daily thing. That every day we have to keep asking God for help. It's really humbling and fortunately, it's starting to humble me.

I'm really excited to start reading a book that maybe you'd like. 'Beautiful Things Happen When A Woman Trusts God.' Just a suggestion :)

Monique@Mommyhood Exposed said...

I'm so sorry about your loss. I am very much life you in that I often times get stuck on one thing in my life and obsess over it-it's like I can't stop thinking about it! It's so difficult, and sometimes I feel like I'm the only one who is like that. It's good to know I'm not alone!

My thoughts and prayers are with you!

Writing Without Periods! said...

Sorry for your loss. Life is tough and the hard things make us appreciate life even more.

Leiah said...

I'm stopping by from SITS. Once again nothing is by coincidence. I was having problems with the post directly above mine so I chose the one with my age on it - 45...yours. I too am struggling and cannot let go and let God take care of it. I'm in a bad work situation and had a great interview and even set a start date but they were supposed to get back with me on salary details but I haven't heard anything yet, and it's been a week. Thank you for reminding me that when I try to be in control nothing will go right. My sympathies on losing your friends. Thank you again for your wonderful reminder!

Shelley said...

First, congratulations on almost being full term. I know it is hard right now and your hormones are probably not helping you out at all.
Second, thank you for posting. I too am struggling in my relationship with God right now. And although I cannot go into specifics, I thank you for having the courage to post this so that others may know that they are not alone.

I truly am sorry about the loss of these two wonderful people from your life. I pray that you will find comfort in the knowledge that you will see them again one day.
Be blessed.

KimJohnson said...

I'm so sorry for your losses. It is never ever easy losing those we care about. Heaven is definitely a great place just because of all the amazing people already there.

FROGGITY! said...

God will always reach out to you because he loves you. :) And don't worry, his timing is perfect, and he cares about all of your worries and thoughts... he hears your questions and will answer them in that perfect time.

I hope your pregnancy is going well! Take care.

Brook said...

Hi there! (said in a sing song tone). :) Dropping by from SITS to say, "hello" and "It's nice to 'meet' you". I wish you God's very best in your struggles. :) And, did I read somewhere it is your birthday (or soon)? If so, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! If not...don't mind me. :) Best wishes and I hope you have a happy weekend.

Kindest regards,

Greener Pastures--A City Girl Goes Country said...

I've been sad about people dying lately. The older I get, the more people die and I can hardly take it. I'm not very religious. I understand why so many people are. There is great comfort in it.

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